Gundam 00 - Gundam Meister

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
Devil Beside You

Watched the show which Alvin lent me yesterday, Devil Beside You. Nice show I should say, the lines in the show are not as predictable as those normal romantic dramas or soap operas. Very touching love stories involved. The main character cum villian reminds me of myself. I am the really rebellious, childish and a guy who doesn't show my emotions openly. Thats why I have alwaes been such a failure.

Read that freakin arrogant girl's blog again. May God bless the soul of her boyfriend, for he doesnt noe till now that his girlfren is cheating on him behind his back. Acting like a 24hrs obedient princess in front of him, but betraying him behind his back. I simply hate this kind of loose women.

Went to her profile to look at her pictures once again. I know I have promised to let her go, but taking a peep at her photos shouldnt be going overboard. I dunno wad to say, but I somehow miss that short, simple and carefree girl whom I seen 4 years back. I am not saying that I hate the wae she dresses now, i am in no position to say that. I just feel that I seem to think that tt is the real her. Well she is who she is, I have no absolute interest in interferring the wae she dresses, it just depress me a little to see the big difference. I guess it is up to her.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
talents..

I was wondering the whole day today, just what talent do I actually possess. I reallie dunnoe. Sometimes I reallie envy my cousin. He is born with a silver spoon in his mouth. His father nurture him into a musically and academically friendly person. I want to learn the piano, but my mum thinks that it is too expensive, and it is unneccessarily. And now, my cousin is hitting the highest grade in piano, she started comparing our talents. Hello? If u were to bring me for piano lessons at the age of three, u think I wun be able to play the piano? His dad is rich, hire the best tutors and music teachers to teach him. And me? How can I compare? I have nothing. I started learning harmonica at the age of nine by joining the school's harmonica ensemble. The conductor has no interest in nurturing the begineers, so I have to pick up the skill on my own. Within three months, the conductor pulled me into the ensemble and I started performing in school concerts. At the end of that particular year, I was the lead player of the ensemble. However, my fame didnt last long. One year later, the harmonica ensemble in my school was disbanded all of a sudden. The conductor left the country and I dunnoe why he fled for. So I have to lock up the harmonica, only taking it out once in a while to practice.When I was eleven, I was forced to join the Chinese Orchestra as I have no CCA. I was in the 扬琴 ensemble. This instructor was worse off than my harmonica conductor. On my first day of practice, he just threw mi into a corner, pass me a pair of drumsticks to knock on a cardboard box. I looked like a fool sitting at a corner like tt. After a while, I was allowed to sit down in front of a proper instrument. However, I was left alone to figure out how to play. No matter how well I played in front of the instructor, he just refuse to teach me others. I was only asked to join in the SYF competition when there isnt enough players. I was at the last row, no fame, no nth. It was at this point of time, I fell in love with the lead 柳琴 player of the 柳琴 ensemble. Back then, I was only 12 years old and she was a year younger than me, 11. She was an elegant gal, and I like the way she sits and play the 柳琴. The melodious music that she plays is what I yearned for everyday. When I confessed to her, she told me this, "Just who are you? You are a 扬琴 player, but u r not a lead. Just what talents do u have which I can feel safe when I m with u. Look at Rit, the lead player of the flute ensemble or Hao Song who is versetile with any chinese orchestra instrument. Can you be like one of them? Can you? They are people whom I look up to. Go home and play with ur toy piano." I forgotten how I felt the other time. Is it because of this, up till now the girl whom I like for years find no sense of security in me. Let me tell u tis, I WANT TO LEARN MUSIC! I WANT TO LEARN EVERY SINGLE MUSICAL INSTRUMENT KNOWN TO MANKIND! BUT DO YOU KNOW OF ANYONE WHO CAN NURTURE ME INTO A MUSCIAL TALENT?? NO!!! NOT MY PARENTS, NOT ANYONE! NO ONE APPRECIATES MY EXISTENCE! YOU THINK ALL MY GODSISTERS ARE ALL SAINTS? SOME OF THEM DUN EVEN RESPECT ME AT ALL! LOOK AT BEN'S CLASS, HALF OF DEM JUST HATE TO SEE ME AROUND AND I DUNNOE WADS THE DAMN REASON FOR THAT! I TRIED MY BEST TO PLEASE THEM! EVEN WHEN THEY HURLED INSULTS AND SPAMMED MY BLOG, I REFUSE TO SETTLE SCORES WITH DEM. YET THEY STILL SHOW ME A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E! SERIOUSLY I WANT TO MAKE FRENS WITH EVERYBODY, BUT THEY REFUSE MY OFFER! YOU CANT BLAME TO BE COLD AND RUTHLESS AT TIMES, YOU PEOPLE FORCED ME INTO IT!

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
plans made

I have made the plans for my future. Since I might noe be eligible to apply for a local university, i might be applying for a foreign university in Australia. However, I will continue to try my best to apply for a local university. Leaving for Australia is my last resort. I have to at least acheive a degree or I am not considered as successful. This is the practical society we live in. These are the few university courses which I considered:

Monash University: B Eng(Electrical & Computer Systems Engineering)

The Australian National University: B Eng(Systems Engineering)

Charles Darwin University: B Eng(Electrical & Electronics Engineering)

Queensland University of Technology: B Eng(Electrical & Computer Engineering)

Also, I want to know how she will feel upon my departure. She claims that even if I were to leave the country and never come back, she wun feel a thing. I reallie hope she doesnt mean wad she says, cuz i noe she is nt tt sort of person. I am unable to save her from the clutches of the Charismatic movements, I am reallie a great big sinner. Now it is all too late to say anything.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
stay strong alwaes...

Today I had a reallie bad day. Lessons are terrible, and I have to bear with a real arrogant girl for the whole dae. Fancy sending her own photo to other ppl's handphone and claiming that is a real beauty which no guys will regret after looking at it. Forget it, describing her arrogance will only shorten my life span. Thought that things would be much better when i got home. However, I felt worse when I reached home. Cuz I accessed her blog and found out how hurt and disappointed she was. I reallie dunnoe wad to do. There isnt a tagboard in her blog, she dun appear online, maybe she blocked me. I dun see her in person. Even if i do, I wun dare 2 ask no matter how much I would like to ask. If you are reading this blog, I just wanna tell u; stay strong. I will be right with u supporting u alwaes, no matter hw much u hate mi...

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
tis isnt God's will

Something bad happened today. I was reallie veri sad when I see it happened. One side of the strap of my Zinc slingbag tore halfwae. I notice it when I was on the bus. Since the day tt bag became my possesion, it has became a priceless possesion of mine. For that bag is given by someone special. I asked my mum if she can sew it back for me. She said she can do it, but marks of the sewing will be left inside of the bag. Which means there will be a "scar" in my bag. I came to realise that she isnt what God has chosen for me. That bag is only one week old, by right nothing should happened to it. But, it just haf 2 be scarred, despite me taking good care of it. At the end of the week, I took the trouble to wipe it clean, making sure there isnt a single speck of dust or dirt left on the bag. However, this thing still happened. Plus seeing Audrey once created a whirlwind inside of my head. I guess I havnt got over her yet. Maybe God wants me to choose her, love her but not have her. Not having her might be tormenting, but having her is nt the main objective of love, it is a want more than a need. Forget it...i dunnoe where i am heading now..

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
Whirlwind inside of my head.

A real tired dae yesterdae. Didnt noe it takes just one day to create a whirlwind inside of my head. Many things which I encountered yesterday made me ponder. I saw her in food junction yesterday during lunchtime. Trust me, I didnt intend to go there at tt hour, cuz I am saving my lunch money for some other things. I was thinking of walking to shopping arcade to try getting one of the reference book for one of my module books. Suddenly, I feel like walking through food junction. Normally, I will just take the passageway. However, this time, my feelings lead me to walk thru food junction. Den there she was, sitting there having her lunch. Didnt noe seeing her will cause so much complications within me. Do I reallie want to move on? I reallie dunnoe. It created a whirlwind inside of my head. I left Food Junction as quick as I could, so as not to think too much. The moment I left, I saw one of her friends, Sabrina. Initially, I wanted to ask her how she was doing as she is the closest to her. Den I remembered, her fren seems to hate me more than she does. I remember adding her in friendster, hoping to hear more abt 'her' life. Up till now she still hasnt accepted my friendster request. So I just quicken my pace and walk past her, afraid that she might pass nasty comments about me. I have learn to cool down yes, but at that point of time I am not sure whether I am able to keep my cool should she pass me any nasty comments. After my night classes, I listened to this same old song, "Just so you know" all the way home. Didnt noe it made me feel worse. I dunno hw to explain why. Well, maybe u shld take a look at the lyrics:

Just So You Know
I shouldn't love you but I want to,
I just can turn away I shouldn't see you
but I can't move can't look away
And I don't know
How to be fine,
when I'm not
Cause I don't know
How to make this feeling stop

CHORUS
Just so you know
this feelings taking control of me
and I can't help it I won't sit around
I can't let it win now
I thought you should know
I tried my best to let go, of you
but I don't want to
I just gotta sat it all before I go
Just so you know

It's getting hard to, be around you
There's so much I can't say
and do you want me to have feelings
and look the other way
And I don't know how to be fine, when I'm not
Cause I don't know How to make this feeling stop

CHORUS
Just so you know
this feelings taking control of me
and I can't help it I won't sit around
I can't let it win now
I thought you should know I tried my best to let go, of you
but I don't want to
I just gotta say it all before I go
Just so you know

This emptiness is killing me
and I'm wondering why I waited so long
Looking back I relized, it was always there to stand spoken
and I'm waiting here been waiting here
mmmm.....

CHORUS
Just so you know
this feelings taking control of me and I can't help it
I won't sit around I can't let it win now
I thought you should know
I tried my best to let go, of you
but I don't want to
I just gotta say it all before I go
Just so you know

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
still not out of the illusion

This few days I have been living without my heart and soul. Real terrible and tormenting period I have been undergoing, though I look fine in school. The pain which I felt within me is reallie unimaginable. It is usually said that the most terrible feeling is unable to express your feelings to the person u like. However, there is an addition which I would like to make to it. Forgetting someone u have loved for a long time and loving someone whom u shouldnt is the most terrible feeling one will have within oneself. I dun wanna lose a fren, and I dun wanna be tormented by this feeling either. If I confessed and get rejected, what will happen to me? I took a long time to clear the broken pieces during the aftermath of my confession. However, I dun want to have this feeling within me either, it is reallie unbearable. This is clash between clearing the feelings within me and my own characteristics. People who reallie knows me(which means those whu dun spammed my blog and whu r alwaes with me) should noe that I dun take gambles in love. If i noe there is no chance, I would just keep quiet and move awae. Someone pls tell mi wad shld i do??

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
finally found it

戏梦
主唱:林志颖
词:陈大力曲:陈大力
编曲:ricky ho

昨天华山论剑今天决战京城
原来世界竟然这么小
去年你是天王今年我是至尊
谁是谁非谁又能分清
飞来飞去飞过人群
飞上云霄看我多逍遥
爱来爱去今天爱你明天爱他到底谁爱我
他们说人生一场梦又何必太计较
青春正年少我应该大声笑
岁月如飞刀它刀刀催人老
再回首天荒地老
他们说人生一出戏
又何必太认真
生旦净末丑我统统扮一回
谁扮谁像谁我扮谁又像谁
别忘了下次再会

I finally found this song. I alwaes hear this song in 97.2 FM, and I find the lyrics veri meaningful. It tells us the facts of life, and also how practical love can be. 爱来爱去今天爱你明天爱他到底谁爱我. How true this can be haha.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
dilemma

This is only the first week of my new semester, and I am already in the straits of dilemma. Every problem, every situation is just so perplexing. How others see no longer bothers me, but what am I gonna be after I graduate? This question has being bugging me for quite some time. Which path should I take in future? This isnt the main problem that is bugging me. After today, I came up with a conclusion; never get caught in a love dilemma. That is exactly the main problem that is bugging me.

Many pushed me to her, many think that we are compaitable or some may think she is the only one compaitable for me. However, I dun exactly know hw I feel. It is kinda mixed up and all, and I reallie dunnoe how to clear this dilemma, no matter how hard I asked God. Guess I still have to wait. I dun mind waiting, but my mind is splitting! I cant stand this reallie. This is what I asked for my ideal partner. Simple yet hard to find:

Dressed decently and NOT scantily
Minimal makeup
Faithful
Christian

She had most of the qualities which I asked for but she missed out the most important thing, that is she isnt a Christian. The Bible stated in Chinese，“不可娶外邦女子为妻”. Simply put as I am not allowed to marry someone who is a non Christian. There is also another thing which made me real confused about, which is I dunnoe hw she feels. Her feelings to me are sometimes hot, sometimes cold. Sometimes I feel the feeling is there, sometimes i tink she feels nothing. Worse of all is I am not sure whether its another false feeling of mine, thinking I am finally able to forget Audrey for good. Lets say it is reallie another false feeling of mine; If she doesnt like mi, thats easy to solve. The most is I am a little hurt in the inside. However, if she does likes me, it will look as if I am cheating her feelings. Alvin is right, I have somehow created a psychological barrier for myself which somehow made me unable to express any feelings. That is why I look cold and unfeeling on the outside.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
things arent getting better

Things arent getting better for this semester. There are so many sophisticated modules to clear. Local and foreign universities are drawing further and further away from me. I cant even get into a foreign university with my current g.p.a, much less a local university. I aimed to get a couple of As and Bs for this semester. The problem is with so much stress, complication and complex explanation, am i able to do it? Gosh I dun 1 2 lose out reallie. I know I am the kind who will slack when I study but I am reallie serious about studying. I just think that putting ur life on the line to acheive success in studies isnt worth it. I like to take it easy so that I wun end up stressing too much till nothing comes up in my mind. Just because I crack a joke during lectures means I am not serious about studying? Please~ Moreover, we just started school this week. If u reallie want me to push so hard, and I end up repeating because I stressed up too much who is going 2 pay for it? Are you or ur parents going 2 pay me for another semester?

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
Here we go again

Yesterday marks the start of a new semester. Wasnt so bad until night class came. Again, it was Kenneth Tan De Neng who starts pissing me off during night class. I assume Bo Yao is gonna be my partner for lab for night class, knowing Kenneth, the good for nothing twerp is going 2 sit down and let him do all the work. What did this maggot do? He sat beside Bo Yao straightaway before I even put my bag down on the chair. He demands me to work alone cuz he has already book Bo Yao way before school starts. Like as if I am going to buy tt story, Bo Yao already said he didnt know anything and I am sure after last semester's Microprocessor lab practices, he will rather die than be his partner. Well forget it, I dun mind working alone. The most pissed off part is when he emphasised to the teacher that everyone must have a partner and that I cannt work alone; I must partner Pei Ling the tyrant man-woman in our class. Freaking hell, fancy pushing those whom he dun like to me. Why dun u keep her for urself den since u get so excited when u heard her name? Whats most disappointing is that the whole class play along with him. They refuse to make any adjustments to it. If I were to be in Ben's class, I am sure Ben will stand up to make the necessary adjustments to it. Although most of his classmates dun see eye to eye with me, but I know they dun play childish games. Since my second semester during first year, I have been wanting to change my module group cuz my class treat me like a dog. When they need my help, they came to me politely like a master taming a dog to help him. Then when everything is over, they kicked me away and use me as a sort of entertainment when they are bored and when there is no jokes to crack, as if i m a dog trying to please the masters. Strangely though, I am able to bear with them until now. I m starting to tink tt i aint myself since the start of poly life. When I was in secondary school, when someone insults me, I will chose to fight even if the opponent is capable enough to skin me alive. Even if I die, I wun let anyone hurt my pride. Thats the mindset I have throughout my secondary school daes. But now, I seem reallie unaffected on the surface even if someone hurt my pride real badly. Alvin once told me that he dun understand why I can still remain so calm even when someone insulted my guts and everything. He didnt noe i wasnt like tt before. In times of troubles now, I just kept real quiet until the trouble died down. I think it might be because of Christ, He changed me from a real temperamental person into a calm person. However, there is still something which hasnt change much. I can forgive, but i still cant forget. I dunnoe why, I have been praying and trying veri hard to forget the damage and pain that others caused me, but I just cant seem to do it. I read a Christian literature "More than a carpenter" by Josh McDowell. There was one part of it which told me about forgiving. Your son breaks ur fav. vase, even if u say u forgive him, whu paid the price for the mess done. Not ur son, but u r. You are going to pay to replace a new vase isnt it? Thats the problem. You forgive the person, but whu is paying the price of sin in the end? U are. When someone hurled insults at u, forgiving him means u r willing to bear with the pschological pain when he caused u. I reallie dunnoe hw to forget the price which I have to pay for them when they insult me, even when I was constantly reminded that Jesus Christ paid dearly for our sins. Someone pls help me, I have a feeling I m going to have a real unhappy and regretful semester this sem.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
Tip to increase the speed of ur computer

Frens! I have found a way to increase the speed of the computer. Thanks to my brother who have imparted me the skills to quicken the speed of my computer seeing that my computer is lagging. Of course, he might have learn this from someone else or read it somewhere, but the credit still goes to him for telling me. I do not like to take other people's credit and pass it off as my own, it is a real low life thing to do. Ok lets cut the crap, this is serious business.

First of all, move all ur files in your "My Documents" folder into your main hardisk drive. Reason being that the computer refreshes files in tt folder every minute. The more files you have in there, the slower ur computer function. The best way is to remove the My Documents icon from the desktop after moving all ur files.

Secondly, this step shld be very familar to many. Remove as many icons as you can away from the desktop. This will make the computer faster in loading up. Too many icons on the desktop will only slow down the startup of ur computer.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
back to square

From Monday onwards, everything will be back to normal. No more extra cash for me for leisure. Also, no more proper lunch. I will have to munch on biscuits etc. so that i will be able to save enough money. There are somethings which need my immediate attention. Lets see:

1) Jereline's B'dae present; tt MYUK wallet which she wanted.
2) Samantha's Birthday present; getting something useful for her
3) Fren's birthdae cake
4) Some Christian literatures
5) Return someone her birthdae present, even though she insist she dun 1.

Poor stomach, it has to undergo perserverence and torment. Cant be help, I didnt choose to live in such environment. Guess I have to resign to it. It isnt as bad as I tink it would be, at least I will loose some weight.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
Happy Birthday Benedict!

First I would like to wish my best fren, Benedict Seah Jun Wen, a Happy 19th Birthday! Whoa~ u r already same age as Takumi Fujiwara, when r u going to purchase ur first AE86 Trueno and become the first Singapore Legendary Road Racer? Hahaha~ Had a great time with the guys today, watching the new Jackie Chan movie, which is both humourous and action packed. After the movies, we had lunch which I didnt eat anithing and walk all the way to Sim Lim Square to replace my lost thumbdrive. The new thumbdrive is a bit different from my old one, but it will have to do. Besides, it has two times more storage space than my prev. one and I bought it at a lower price than the lost one which my dad bought for me. Have to keep mum about this, cuz I didnt tell my mum that I lost my thumbdrive. I borrowed money from Ben to buy it, and I wonder when will I be able to clear the debts.

After that, we went to Bugis to get the handphone pouches which my mum ask me to buy. Bought four different colours. She wants to get sth for my uncles in Indonesia when she goes back this december. Phew~ at least i wun be uptight for two weeks when she is awae. Den went to Wallet shop to choose a wallet for .... mei. Not gonna reveal her name here or she will noe wads her birthdae present. Well her birthdae is still long, so I just aim the wallet first. Besides, I havent ani money. ~sigh~ Guess it is plain white bread for meals once school reopen. No choice, must tahan!!!

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
change of mindset.

Just this morning, I was determined to nab tt spammer for his propostrous allegations against me and the others. However, when I was having my own quiet time in Church, i came across this testament.
Psalm 27:1-8:
The Lord is my light and my salvation; Whom should I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life; Of whome shall I be afraid? When the wicked came against me to eat up my flesh, my enemies and foes, they stumbled and fell. Though an army may encamp against me, my heart shall not fear; Though war may rise against me, in this I will be confident. One thing I have desired of the Lord, that will I seek: That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord, and to inquire in His temple. For in the name of trouble He shall hide me in His pavillion; In the sercret place of His tarbanacle He shall hide me; He shall set me upon a rock. And now my head shall be liften up above my enemies all around me; Therefore I will offer sacrifices of joy in His tarbanacle; I will sing, yes, I will sing praises to the Lord. Hear, O Lord, when I cry with my voice! Have mercy also upon me, and answer me. When You said, "Seek My face." My heart say to You, "Your face, Lord, I will seek."

So if I were to get even with tt spammer, I will be in the wrong too. Why not just pray and let him face God's judgement later. For I am just the dust of the Earth and is of no position to judge others.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
of course u noe this means war..

anonymous: donst act infront girl girl want la... no one likes you also... so act infront of girl lyk you hen handsome..puiiiiiiiiiii

As on today, 8th of October 2006, 5:14AM, I am officially on war with this sickening annonymus whu is reallie unbearablingly annoying. First he/she/somewhere in the middle spammed samantha's blog, now he is here to spam mine. Is he tired of living or wad? Coming into Samantha's blog alreadi pissed me off, but I decided to tag back on samantha's blog as a threat. And on this fateful morning, I saw this bastard/bitch or whuever he/she is SPAM MY BLOG. I m not going to just let things go by deleting ur post. I am going to print it out, together with the time and the date and the IP address and storm into Starhub HQ. U tink having IP addresses can get u awae from spamming? Dun dream, I can check with the HQ whu the hell used the IP add at this particular day and time, u cannot run awae u bastard. Clean ur ass up and get ready to go to jail.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
truth is coming to light

After years of blinded truth, things are finally coming to light. Those who are true towards me, and those who arent are finally going to reveal themselves. As on today, 7th of October 2006, 7:37PM, I am going to disown some of my godsisters for I have seen with my own naked eyes those who arent reallie taking me into account or are using me. Their names I shall not name for they themselves should noe who they are. They will be given time to search themselves. Apologies may be accepted but acceptance meant nothing, trust will not be back as easy as taking a candy from a baby. No personal grudges or jealousy involved, it is simply just the truth. Although in the end, I might be left with only one or two. But at least I know that they are true. I can only say that Samantha Seng is definitely not on the list of disownment and she will never be. For she is true to me and the people around her, I cant sae the same for the others. Dun wurry Samantha, kor still remembered the vow I made to u, and I will never break it for you have proven me your faithfulness and loyalty towards friendship ties.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
Success Test

Manager: You'll be pretty successful, and if you play your cards right, you'll keep on moving up to the top. We think you might be a little to distracted by some things ( sex ). Once you find out how to manage these vices and stop playing Solitaire at work, you'll start moving much faster. A little sucking up to the boss every now and then never hurts, either :-)

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
Political Test

Moderate: You are moderate, which means you're, well, on the fence. What does this mean? You tend to have a centrist view across the board, whether the issue is social or economic in nature. You like the government and the people to take an equal part in sharing the governing of the country. Moderates generally like certain parts of political platforms, but usually never all the policies from a single platform. You share similar social and economic views with the presidents of Germany and France.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
Sexual Purity Test

Purely Innocent: You are as pure as the day your were born. Well, maybe a little less, but you're still pretty innocent. Where were you during that spin the bottle game? Were you absent during heatlh class? Whether you just missed out or you were holding off, you've done pretty well avoiding some of the naughtier things in life. However, a little harmless fun never hurt anybody; after all, you don't want to star in the sequel to The 40-year-old Virgin, do you?

How true is this? People nowdaes are so free eh?

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
much better than last year

well i mentioned that throughout the years of my birthday, none of my godsisters remembered my birthdae, much less celebrate it of course. However, this year things have improved. Yeah, great improvement I must say. One of them remembered, and she happens to be my favourite sis; Samantha. I reallie cant tell how happie I was as I only acknowledged samantha a few months ago, and she beats those whom I have acknowledged since 2003. Yeah, one isnt making things ani better, but it is a great improvement. I dun expect them giving me presents, that will only give me a heart attack. Why? Because I am very sure they will never do that. So one birthday wish from any of dem marks a great improvement. I am reallie contented to have a fruitful birthdae tis year. Although none of parents celebrated or even wished mi happy birthdae, but frens are family out of home rite?

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
How jealous am i?

You are 30.16% jealous!For this test, the average jealousy percentage is 35.54%.555708 people have taken this test to date.
This percentage means that :
•You are not a jealous person, but sometimes can be.
•Occasionally, you over-react to situations.
•Most of the time, you trust the people around.
•Jealously will not be a major issue in relationships, but you might want to improve your self-esteem.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
financially troubled

With my personal savings confiscated, I am now financially troubled. I borrowed some cash from Ben and I wonder when will be able to clear the debt. Its gonna take a long time, I hope he will understand. I have to replace my thumbdrive as I lost it in school. Letting my mum know abt the loss will only cause her to be more paranoid. So dun be surprised if u see me surviving with only biscuits during mealtimes. I need to save for a long time before i can clear my debts. Of course, I will be able to slim down during this period of time so it isnt reallie a bad thing. Friends and classmates reading this blog, pls refrain from bringing to places of leisure like arcades and K Box or some food paradise such as steamboat, i reallie dun haf enuf to pay. I appreciate all those whu had offered to lend me some money, but I cant accept it animore. My debts to my frens are too much for me to accept. I hope all of u understand my situation, my family background is a real perculiar and weird one that the saints above can even understand.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
Birthday presents and wishes appreciated!

I am officially 18 as from today, which embarks the journey of my adulthood. First of all, i would like to express my deepest graditudes to my friends for their presents and birthday wishes. These are the people whom I would want to thank:
1) Benedict
2) Raymond
3) Wei Siang
4) Wan Yin Jie
5) Alvin
6) Chiu Yen
7) Charlene
8) Samantha
9) Thomas

My apologies if I forgot to mentioned those whu have express their wishes during my birthdae.
Well this are my new birthday wishes:
1) World Peace
2) Find the right one
3) Replace my lost thumbdrive
4) New specs

Quite simple but somehow difficult to achieve.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
no freedom

Dun be surprised that this entry is posted early in the morning. I was woken up by my mum. I thought it was for sth important. You noe wad was the so called "urgent" thing? She wants me to show her my personal savings cuz she want to check hw much I used. I feel like a bird being caged up. I am already eighteen and she still refuse to set me free. When she found out that I have used the money, she started asking me why did I use the money because she remembered that I have $30. Why am I left with only $15? Why am I left with only $15? Hello? She took all my savings and put them all insie my wallet, and u pass it off as my allowance. I need the money for offerings on sundays. She didnt give me a single cent for my allowance throughout the holidaes. I am left with $30 of my own savings to spend for the holidaes, cant i use dem? She had certainly ruined my mood for the birthdae celebration that ben and ray has prepared for mi todae. Now, when can i gain independence in my life???

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
WARNING: EXTREMELY ANGRY POST! PARENTAL ADVISORY REQUIRED!

THIS IS AN EXTREMELY ANGRY POST! DUN READ IT IF U DUN WANT TO! I POURING OUT ALL THE INJUSTICE I SUFFERED IN MY SEC SCHOOL. I AM GOING TO LET IT OUT ONCE AND FOR ALL!

LEONG YUTING: THANKS FOR TEARING MY PRIDE APART BY SAYING I DUN HAVE THE LOOKS TO FALL IN LOVE. THANKS FOR DESTROYING MY SELF ESTEEM. FROM THEN DAY ONWARDS I NO LONGER HAVE THE COURAGE TO CONFESS TO THE GIRL I LIKE. SO I CREATED SMOKESCREEN, MAKING OTHERS BELIEVE THAT I M IN LOVE WITH A GIRL WHOM I DUN LIKE AT ALL. REMEMBER THE OTHER TIME WHEN U WERE SICK? I CALLED UR HOME TO ASK HOW U WERE DOING? WHAT DID U SAE TO ME? "MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS, YOU ARENT FIT TO ASK?" SUAVE ARENT YOU? FELT GREAT DUN U??

LIM YIWEE: YOU ARE THE OTHER ONE WHO TOTALLY DESTROYED ME. I WAS ONLY SECONDARY ONE THEN, AND YOU HAVE TO DO THIS TO ME? I WASNT EVEN IN LOVE WITH U FOR HEAVEN' S SAKE!!! YOU COLLABORATED WITH YUTING TO TOTALLY DESTROY MY SELF-ESTEEM! WADEVER I DO, YOU HAVE TO INSULT, LEAVING ME NO PLACE TO STAND! WHO U TINK U R, A MAMA SAN?

NG SHU JUAN: YOU ARE THE DARN WOLF IN SHEEP'S CLOTHING. I ACCEPTED U AS A FRIEND, AND YOU BACKSTABBED ME!!! YOU CREATED A DARN RUMOUR, A RUMOUR WHICH TOOK AWAE MY PRIDE, AND MY DIGNITY. WHERE IS UR CONSCIENCE??!!! UP TILL NOW YOU STILL DUN 1 2 CLARIFY AND CLEAR THE MESS YOU CREATED, MAKING MI LEAVE BARTLEY FULL OF DOUBTS AND REGRETS. YOU STILL HAVE THE CHEEK TO TELL OTHERS NOW THAT U HAVE NEVER LIED???? HIDING UR PATHETIC ASS IN NGEE ANN POLY AND IGNORING THE MESS U CREATED, U R A DARN LOSER! I DEMAND U TO COME OUT AND CLARIFY U GET IT! I AM NOT A SICK PERVERT!!! I DIDNT DO IT, CLEAR MY NAME AND SET ME FREE! I M GIVING U TILL CHRISTMAS, IF THE PROBLEM STILL ISNT SETTLED AFTER CHRISTMAS, DUN BLAME ME FOR BEING RUTHLESS!!! I WILL MAKE SURE I WILL TEAR DOWN UR DARN MASK AND REVEAL UR DESPICABLE FACE!!!

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
scum of the earth.

I went into one of my godsister's close friend's profile. I knew her in frenster last year, was quite a fan of her at first cuz i thought she was the one in a million kind of girl whu is clean and innocent. After reading her profile, I think she isnt. Looks can be reallie deceiving. Was reallie quite hurting to see her true self. When I saw her during teachers dae when I visited Bartley, she was shouting awae, but i didnt make ani conclusions. Thought maybe she is just excited at tt moment. Den I read a testimonial written by a guy to her, I found out that she shouts frequently in school. Well of course that is not enough to judge her character, i m not done with explaining. I entered that guy's profile. Yeah, he is kinda handsome. I saw both she and the guy taking a picture so close to each other. Not only that, there is another girl on the other side of his shoulders. And she doesnt mind. So looks is what meant most to girls nowadaes? Yeah I hear things like, "what rubbish~ the heart is what matters most..." How many actually have this mindset. Knowing that guy is so flirtatious and fling around, this girl can still actually act so intimidately with him. No one will believe she is no loose girl. This kinda guy is reallie a scum of the earth. Thats why i never like pretty bois, i detest them. Play around, make empty promises, thats what they do best. Worse of all, the girls still defend them. I wun be surprise someone coming into my blog and tagging things like "f la, u r just jealous. he isnt tis kind of guy." Ha, prove it den.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
Finished my sunday school homework.

I finished my sunday school homework todae. I must say it is real difficult to understand those traditional chinese words as I have been reading simplified chinese characters since when i was a kid. Nevertheless, I managed to complete it after much difficulty. Not only that, I managed to memorise those two testaments which will be tested this sunday. I vowed to be a better Christian and live a more spiritual life, and I am going to do it. Almost done reading "More Than A Carpenter" by Josh McDowell. I cant believe the author was actually against Bible prophecies before he wrote the book. He convinced many the authentity of Bible prophecies. Great book I recommend this to all believers.

Currently financially troubled. I have no more personal savings left. Whats worse, my mum asked me to surrender all my personal savings to her. If I give it to her, I will have nothing left. ZERO! She complains everydae that I dunnoe the importance of saving. The only thing I noe is to stick out my hand and ask her to get me things I want. This is a lie okie, my bro is the one who keeps asking her to buy the things that he wants, why didnt she complain? I dare not even ask her anything. Even for the things which I want, I dun even dare to tell her. I save every single cent of my lunch money, so that I will be able to get things tt I want with my own savings. I wonder when will this period end. I am no longer a kid, I AM ALMOST EIGHTEEN! PEOPLE WILL LAUGH AT ME!

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
what saiyuki character am i?