Gundam 00 - Gundam Meister

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
Unbelievable change in life

Things have changed in life. I thought it was changing for the better for this semester. Now I realised that it was just an illusion. Things were never better than before. New friends are not better than the old ones. How I miss the old days, heart warming and friendly. Too disappointed to continue, shall continue again some other time.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
Flunk, flunk, flunk

Cleared my EG3161-Embedded Systems Design common test paper yesterday. Erm...cleared is not the word to use in this case. Okay, I screwed the paper up. I studied practically everything on theory for the common test as up till now, the lecturer taught us mostly on the theory part. Darn little did I noe the lecturer was so nice to make things easier for us by coming out all on calculations. There are basically only less than 15 formulas to memorize and i memorized all those theory for nothing. Only one question came out on the theory i learnt. I even studied on the ASM diagram which didnt come out at all. Feel so dumb all of a sudden. No big deal, always flunked common test, dunno why it always happen. There are two papers on fridae and those are my last. I wonder if i can clear them. I wonder who was the idiot who scheduled two papers on the same dae. I just hope I can switch my mindset to the afternoon paper after finishing the morning's paper on friday.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
Naive as always.

Looks like I am naive as always. I still have this thinking that being nice to ppl around u, they will be happy and grateful. You dun have to let them know what you have done for them, seeing the smiles on their face is good enough. However, I see tt it dun always happen. Why am I always so naive? I took all the precautions to prevent her from knowing who the sender of the EG3161 notes were, but alas she still found out. Her reaction reallie hurt me badly. I know I did wrong by misusing the resume tt she gave me. I might have been to rash, but what I wanted to do was to help her. If I could, I would rather give it to her upfront. I didnt think of mailing it to her house at first, I really thought of giving it to her upfront. However, I am afraid ppl around her might think that I am up to no good. So I sent the notes to her anonymously, so that she will not know who sent it to her. But she knew it straightaway. I thought she will just accept it. But she actually took the trouble to scan everything that I sent her and emailed it to my email account. I was really hurt. It has always been my dream to make everyone around me happy, but in the end I hurt myself. I don't want to go back to school next week, I feel like giving up on my education. I felt too humiliated to return to school. Can I just leave school? I cant imagine the pointing of fingers and the stares I haf to bear when I go back to school on monday. I hope everyone will act as if nothing will happen. There I am, dreaming again.

My Lord, take me away from this world. I once love the world more than You but now, I long to be with You everyday.

`Gundam 00 dispatching enemy ;
The Challenge

I have never felt challenged academically in my life before. I always feel that as long as we do our best, it is okay if we do not excel. However, today I feel different during the Mobile Computing practical session. Someone just sent me a direct challenge right into my face. There was nothing much to do in the lab for today, so I went to the internet to see what web services I can add into my project. However, someone(shall not name who) accused me of not doing anything in the lab and trying to depend fully on my project partners to do the programming. He said that if I dun start doing anything, we wun do the project with me. The way he say it is like without him, I will not be able to complete the project, I have to rely either on him or copying the codes from my other classmates. Very well then, I will infuse the true image of Darren Ng a.k.a Wammy's Orphan Mello, future founder of Singapore's Wammy's orphan house in your mind. I will do the project individually, I will not join any people's group including his. Since you think I m a maggot who always rely on others, I will do this project on my own. I will make u eat ur words!

eXiä